NASRETTIN HODJA JOKES


WHAT IF IT HAPPENS

When they saw Hodja sitting by the lake and stirring some yogurt into the water they asked him what he was doing.
"I am  adding starter into the lake to make yogurt ," he answered.
"But is it possible to turn the lake into yogurt?"
"I know it is impossible but what if I succeed,"Hodja replied.







BATH TIP

One day Hodja goes to the Turkish Bath.The keepers,of the bath don't care for him at all.They give him an old and torn bath towel.Hodja doesn't say anything .When he is leaving the bath,hi gives them a generous tip.When he comes to same bath a week later,he is served very well this time,but he gives them a very little tip.The keepers of the bath say:
-
"Effendi,are you giving such a little tip for our great care and respect?"Hodja Says:
-
"The tip I'm giving today is for last week's service.The tip I gave last week was for today's service.":D





DUCK SOUP 

Hodja saw a group of ducks in the lake.He tried to catch one but couldn't succeed.So,he sat by the lake and look out a loaf of bread from his saddlebag.He broke it into pieces,started dunking them into the water and eating them.A passerby saw Hodja and asked him what he was eating.Hodja dunked another piece in and said;
-"Duck Soup."





THE INVITATION CARD

When Nasreddin Hodja's son of his neighbor is going to be married,he asked Hodja to send out some of his invitation cards.Hodja take the one who is known as proud and very rich.The rich man open the door and see hodja with the invitation card,and in a proud wat says:
-"Don't they find an acceptable person for this job instead of you?"Hodja answered in a smooth way:
-"There is some but these acceptable ones go to the accceptable people."




EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE 

One day the Hodja's friends came to his house and called him.But the Hodja,who didn't what them in his house,told his wife to say,that he wasn't at home."But we saw that he entered the hause",said his friends.The Hodja listening to them got very angry,he opened the window and shouted:
-"You One day the Hodja's friends came to his house and called him.But the Hodja,who didn't what them in his house,told his wife to say,that he wasn't at home."But we saw that he entered the hause",said his friends.The Hodja listening to them got very angry,he opened the window and shouted:
-"You how men!Isn't is possible,that this house has two doors?Can this poor man not go out the backdoor?"



A PAN OF BAKLAVA 

When a foreign scholar came to Akşehir and asked to talk to the wisest man in town,they called Hodja.When they met,the man drew a circle on the ground with a long stick.Then,Hodja got the stick and drew a straight line dividing the circle into two equal parts.The man then drew a line perpendicular to the one Hodja had  drawn,thus dividing the circle into four equal parts.Hodja gestured like he was taking the three parts and leaving the fourth to the scholar.Then,the stranger brought the fingers of his right hand together and shook his hand pointing towards the ground.Hodja did just the opposite;he strecthed out his fingers.
When the meeting was over,the scholar explained:
"Your Hodja is very smart.When I told him that the Earth is round,he said that the equatar divides it into two.When I divided the Earth into four sections,he said that three fourths of it is water and one fourth of it is land.When I asked him what causes rain,he told me that water evaporates,vapor rises,forms clouds and then turns inyo rain."
Then,they asked Hodja what happened during the meeting and this is what he told:
"That glutton!He said,'Let's have a pan of baklava' I told him,you can't eat it alone.I will eat half of it.'What would you do,if I divide it into four?'He asked and I told him,'I would eat three fourths of it.'Then he sad 'Let's sprinkle some nuts on it.' I said 'O.K. but you can't do it on hot ashes,you need flaming fire for it.'He couldn't go on any more,so he left."